Week 21 – I make my own fun

week-21

Something seemingly inexplicable happened this week. I am going to withhold the specifics, for now, because doing so would reveal too much vulnerability. I wouldn’t even be sharing anything about it but I need  a weekly blog topic and my mind just wouldn’t let this one go. I am an INFJ, as I have stated in previous posts and I am private; it can be extreme. Some may consider this a flaw but since I no longer concern myself with others opinions of me, so I win that one. Every. Time. Honestly, discovering my personality type has been a profound & beautiful justification to my way of being, Previously, I’ve contoured who I am to match the ones I am surrounded by because I lacked the confidence to let my freak flag fly. As my confidence grows, my fabulous freak flag gets bigger and brighter every day.

So back to this inexplicable thing that happened this week. This issue of mine began around 7 or 8 years of age. The drama that triggered this thing wasn’t pretty, I closed a door, threw away the key and have had emotional temper tantrums in varying degrees ever since. So, needless to say this is a sensitive one. Thirty years of tantrums creates specific patterns that require time and patience to change. For years, I’ve said to hell with this thing. I didn’t need it, no longer wanted it and I’m better off without it. Yikes!

I think all the laughing I’ve been doing helped shift this thing to a slight degree yet measurable, nonetheless. Laughter just feels sooo good. I didn’t address this thing in my DMP but it does state, “my house is filled with laughter”. My intention was meant for my brick & mortar house but I am starting to think something else is manifesting. I may live in my brick & mortar house but more so in my body, so if my body is filled with laughter then my house must follow.

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